Elliot Page Opens Up On Abuse, Past Relationships & Coming Out In Memoir, PageBoy

The actor rose to fame with a performance in 2017’s Juno but was unable to come out as a lesbian until 2014. Elliot Page battled fears about his career in Hollywood, his family’s ambivalence toward queerness, and, most overwhelming his struggle with self-acceptance. He also spent years wondering if he wasn’t a woman and had been unable to speak about his gender without an outburst of tears.

Page, who officially told the public in 2020 that he’s trans, has released his Memoir, PageBoy, and below are a few stories about his experiences in Hollywood.

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One Of The World’s Famous Actors S*Xually Harassed Page Shortly After She Came Out As A Lesbian

At a birthday bash, a famous actor told Page that being gay “doesn’t exist” and that Page is “just afraid of men.” When Page hit back at the remarks, the actor allegedly harassed him. “‘I’m going to f*ck you to make you realize you aren’t gay. I’m going to lick you’re a**hole. It is going to taste like lime. You’re not gay,” Page recounted. “He kept describing how he was going to f*ck me, touch me, lick me. How he liked to pity f*ck women … He was, and still is, one of the most famous actors in the world.”

Page Was Urged To Remain Closeted During Juno’s Promotion, Suffering Homophobia Both At Home And In Hollywood

“The success of Juno coincided with people in the industry telling me no one could know I was queer,” he writes. “I was struggling with depression and having panic attacks so bad I would collapse. I could barely function. Numb and quiet, nails in my stomach, I was incapable of articulating the depth of pain I was in, especially because ‘my dreams were coming true,’ or at least that is what I was being told. I dismissed my feelings as dramatic, berated myself for being ungrateful. I felt too guilty to say I was hurting, incapacitated, that I didn’t see a future.” At home, his mother urged him to abandon his tomboy life and date men.

Page Had A Secret Romance With Kara Mara

While Kate Mara was in an open relationship with Max Minghella, Page also had a romantic relationship with the House of Cards star. “This was right after I’d come out as gay and it was a time of exploration and also heartbreak,” Page writes. “I think my relationship, or whatever you want to call it with Kate, very much encapsulates a certain dynamic that I consistently found myself in, which was falling for people that — I think a lot of us do this — who aren’t fully available. And the sort of safety in that and the highs and the lows and the serotonin bump, and then it goes away.”

Page Also Dated Other Unnamed Hollywood Figures

A girlfriend described by Page as, “queer and confident, an actor whose movies I loved,” introduced him to her queer community, while another, nicknamed “Ryan,” was more closeted than Page and could barely interact with him in public. “It was not a sustainable relationship, just like when I had kept people hidden.” Page writes. “The lying, the anxiety, the disgust. People didn’t ‘think she was queer,’ but they definitely assumed I was, and I don’t think she could handle the shame.”

Interestingly, He Also Had A Relationship With Juno Co-star Olivia Thirlby

Page claims his romantic relationship with Olivia Thirlby helped him begin a journey toward self-acceptance. “I had an all-encompassing desire for her, she made me want in a way that was new, hopeful,” Page writes. “Being intimate with Olivia helped my shame dissipate. I didn’t see a glint of it in her eyes and I wanted that — done feeling wretched about who I am.” The pair at the time often hung out with Michael Cera and Jonah Hill between filming.